The Baby Apocalypse Prevention Squad
by xmenfan33
Summary: New year,New Students, more Chaos, ... and more babies, oh and Logan's in charge. They may all go insane. Book six of the Babysitting series. Rogue/Remy,John/Wanda,Piotr/Kitty,and Bobby/Jubilee... Featuring Deadpool
1. Eloping is NOT on the chart

DISCLAIMER: I do not own X-men Evolution.

A/N: The long awaited (Not Really) Sixth book in the Babysitting Series:

_**The Baby Apocalypse Prevention Squad**_

Chapter One

**Eloping is NOT on the chart.**

Tabitha, Ray, Amara, Sam, Jamie, and Rahne were sitting in the kitchen. They contemplated their fates. Because they were going to die. They know they had said that before, but this time was different. This time they really were. Because of what happened yesterday. It didn't start out that badly. Piotr had finally asked Kitty to marry him. In fact, the was cause for celebration! Logan may actually be cheerful (for him) when he found out... and he would find out. But then...But then the bad thing happened. Bobby and Jubilee disappeared right before lights out. Amara had done a decent job covering her absence, and they thought it was going to be okay, when they caught them sneaking in an hour ago.

Until Jubilee told them they had eloped. Eloping was NOT on the chart. They knew. it was taped to the fridge. They had all double checked. Amara grabbed Jubilee and shook her. "What were you thinking?! Did you ever think about how bad it would be to blatantly ignore that chart!" Amara whisper-screamed. Ever since Logan had publicly declared himself the Chart-Bearer during Rogue and Remy's honeymoon, he'd gotten scarier. NO ONE dis obeyed the charts! Disobeying anything on the charts was frightening. And not just for the offender.

This was going to be bad they were going to end up in another day (or possibly week) long lecture on responsibility. Because THEY disobeyed. Wait! Maybe if they told on the couple first, Logan would go easy on them! Now they just had to wait for him to come in. While they waited, Remy and Rogue came in, Kaitie between them, shakily walking along. This added a new level of horror to the other residents. A fire-starting infant was scary enough, they could deal not with a fire-starting toddler! Collectively they stood and left, yelling something about the mall. The couple watched them go and then shrugged.

" So, you ready to tell everyone yet?" Remy asks her as she sets the baby in the high chair. " Nope, I'm waiting for just the right time, don't worry it'll happen soon, especially with what happened last night." Remy chuckles, as he pours some cherios onto Kaitie's tray. Rogue makes her a bowl of oatmeal and begins feeding her, as Remy cooks their breakfast and Logan walks in.

"Logan, would you like some eggs?" Remy asks as Logan pours himself coffee. Logan grunts something that sounded like a yes, and sits down. Rogue says "Pete asked Kitty to marry him last night" Logan looks up and says "really?!" before pulling out his score card and making a notation. "I'll call the paper later" He says. "We need to get to work on the other wedding too. Jubes turned eighteen yesterday, and Iceboy did last week. The sooner the better an-" Rogue cuts him off while dodging a handful of oatmeal & cereal." Actually, I overheard this morning that they got married last night. Apparently Amara covered for them" Logan pales, then the vein in his forehead appears, he storms out of the kitchen screaming about the charts and screaming for the newlyweds.

Remy snickers and says "That was just mean, Chere, now they'll all be in it deep for sure" Rogue shrugs and replies. "It is our duty as official ABA squad members to report any breach of the charts. And now they've learned not to mess with me." Rogue had been trying to find a way to get back at Amara and Tabitha for borrowing (and breaking) her hair straitener with out asking. The others were collateral damage. Remy laughs and then sighing, hands Kaitie back to Rogue. The baby had gotten tired of being in the highchair and 'poofed' herself to her father. She at least seemed to be in control of it, and she had to be looking at wherever she was going to land. Therefore, they had given up on trying to get her to stop.

~o~O~o~

Scott was in the garage, working on his car not hiding from Jean, when the new student arrived. He watched her pull up, and was shocked by her state of dress. He realized he was staring and clearing his throat said. "Welcome to Xavier's, I'm Scott, Scott Summers" She smirks at him before stating "Hello, I'm Emma Frost, just one Emma" He laughs and offers to help her with her bags. She opens the trunk and stands back.

Scott is busy taking her to her room and talking to her. He doesn't notice Logan until it's to late to hide. Logan was already on the warpath, thanks to the news about last night. Seeing Scott, who was the greatest violator of the chart in the house, walking down the girls' hall with a barely dressed blond sent him over the edge.

Everyone in the house heard him scream. Remy and Rogue barely glance up as Logan chases Scott through the living room. Scott is screaming what sounds like the beginning of a prayer over and over again. Scott rushes out the door and down into the woods. Logan pauses in the doorway to say in an eerily calm voice "We have an ABA meeting at three. Please pass it on." before following after Scott. They blink after him, before Remy states "I wonder what he did this time" Before Rogue can reply, a voice behind them says " He offered to help carry my bags, I was unaware that was against the rules." They turn and see Emma, who immediately gives Remy her most flirty smile. Rogue growls and Remy hugs her and says "You should put some clothes on before wandering around here, unless you want Logan to chase you down to." to Emma before turning around and ignoring her. Emma mumbles something about wearing clothes, and Rogue tells her that she thinks it must have shrunk in the wash. Causing Remy to snicker. Huffing Emma walks out. Rogue then kisses him and he says "What was that for?" Rogue smiles and says " For not even glancing at her boobs." Remy laughs again and says. "She reminded me of a slightly more modest version of my ex-fiancée.

~o~O~o~

Three o'clock rolls in and Remy, Rogue, and the baby make their way to the meeting room. Logan would have preferred the war room, but Xavier didn't see the need. Maybe he took away the tea to soon. Oh well, to late now. Kurt, who had come home for the weekend, was already there. He smiles at his sister and niece, and nods at Remy. Kurt and Remy had bonded over beating the crap out of Mystique about a month ago, she had been trying to mess with Kaitie and Rogue again. He'd also found that Bobby was right, his niece was adorable ...as long as she didn't cry, or sneeze..., or hiccup. He was still afraid of her powers, but after spending the last three months with the new family, he had curbed his scream. ...For the most part...unless it was a big fire, like when she was teething, that was scary. For everybody. By the end, even Remy was a little disturbed.

John and Wanda join them a few minutes later, Wanda was just now starting to get a 'baby bump' . John was looking haggard, she'd sent him to the store five times last night, and when he reminded her that he'd already bought her butterscotch ice cream, she'd hexed him. Then remembered that she doesn't even like butterscotch, she had meant caramel. Which she was now eating out of a gallon tub. Wade (who for some reason continued to come to these meetings) and Logan came in a moment later.

"NINJA-SLAYER!" Wade yelled seeing Kaitie, who giggled and 'poofed' to him. Her parents groan. Wade happily begins to rant about the future partnership before Remy retrieves his daughter from the insane mercenary. Logan walks out. Kurt shakes his head and John watches with sympathy. Before it can escalate further, Logan re-enters dragging Kitty and Piotr with him.

" ...Why do they have bags over their heads?" Wanda asks. "So they don't know where we are, they ain't trustworthy enough yet. They've only just defected to our side. "Logan replies, while removing the bags."... There's a huge sign on the door, everybody knows where it is!" John states, unusually cranky, after his multiple trips to the store. " SHHHHHHHHHH!" Logan and Wade state.

Hey everybody, Remy and I ha-" Rogue begins to say ,but is interrupted by Kurt stating " But everybody DOES know where we meet." Wade frowns at Kurt, and states "Are you questioning the logic of the Chart-Bearer? " Kurt quickly shakes his head. After a moment Rogue begins again "So anyw-" interrupted again, this time by John standing up and screaming, while shaking out his shirt. Wanda had accidentally dropped a large glob of ice cream down the back of his shirt, while trying to shove it at Kitty. Wanda wanted a second opinion on if it was to cold. Judging by John's reaction it was.

Logan cleared his throat, then began "So I have called this meeting today, to deal with the grievous violation of the charts that occurred last night. No-" Logan was cut off by Wade who asked. "What violation?!" Remy rolls his eyes, and Rogue continued to pout over being interrupted. Remy states while hugging her " Bobby and Jubilee eloped, now Roguey wanted to say someth-" Remy is interrupted by Wade screaming and jumping to his feet. "What's THIS?! Someone tell me gator-bait is joking! This can NOT happen!" He pulls out a remote and pushes the button. The B.A. countdown calculator dropped from the ceiling.

It read  
03:01:10:18:44:06  
Wade pushed a second button, and it changed to  
01:03:00:23:11:59

Seeing this, Logan begins to pace, pulling out a second set of notes that he and Wade begin calculating. Rogue clears her throat and begins again "As I was trying to say, Rem-" She is cut off again, this time by Scott sneaking past the window. Logan rushes out the door, yelling over his shoulder "Be right back, Wade's in charge" Everybody collectively turns to Wade, (though Kitty and Piotr were still quietly trying to find away to escape) Wade asks what Scott did now. Remy explains " As far as we can tell, he was caught flirting with the new girl, you know the one who forgot to get dressed? And Logan caught them alone upstairs, a clear violation of rule 128b. Roguey's pregnant. Logan chased Scott out back, but then had to come back in so that he could continue the search for last night's offenders."


	2. The Calm before the Storm

DISCLAIMER: I do not own X-men Evolution

Chapter Two  
**" The Calm before the Storm"**

There was a deep silence following Remy's statement. The kind that you know means all hell is about to break loose. Rogue mentally counts it down, while Remy tries to remember why it was that they wanted to raise their children near these people. Kaitlyn sneezes and he takes Kaitlyn back from Kurt. This seems to break the spell as Kitty,Wanda, and Kurt state " You're pregnant?!" (Kurt in horror, the other two with excitement). Rogue nods as Wade then yells " THERE'S GOING TO BE TWO NINJA-SLAYERS?!" Wade pushes another button on his remote, changing the numbers on the countdown  
14:03:06:13:41:09

" Now if only it were twins" Wade muses, while adjusting his scorecard, " Rogue does it feel twinish to you?" Rogue shrugs and tells him that she just took the test this morning. Wade turns to Remy . " Then we still have time for adjustment, You! Go make it twins" Shoving Remy and Rogue toward the door " Don't worry, I'll watch NS for you, go now." Remy protests the idea of leaving Kaitlyn, while Wanda says " I'm pretty sure that's not how it works Wade." and Piotr paled notably when the news sank in. Logan walks back through the door, dragging a bound Scott behind him. Wanda immediately jumps forward and smacks Scott in the head with a dictionary from the nearby shelf. When the others look at her questionly, she shrugs and says " I might not like the preppy little redhead, but us preggers need to stick together." Everyone nods in agreement and Logan glances at the countdown timer. He does a double take and then says " Stripes, your pregnant?" Rogue nods, Remy pales, and Wade states, while still attempting to push the couple out the door " I'm trying to maximize the good Karma, but they seem resistant to trying to get twins." Logan removes a chart and begins calculating, while Wanda again protests Wade's theory, and Remy tries to grab his daughter.

Scott then asks, as Piotr pulls the bag off his head, why he has to be here. This causes them all to freeze. Then everyone turned from their previous activities to sit and stare at Scott. He blinks back at them. What could they possibly want now? He hadn't done anything. This couldn't possibly be because he'd flirted with the new girl, right? His eyes slide to Logan, who was pulling out The Book. Maybe it was.

The Book was practically legend throughout the mansion. The only people who had ever actually seen it were the members of the Anti-Baby-Apocalypse squad. Logan had had it special made, it was a large leather-bound volume, with gold fringe. It was extremely thick, as it contained every rule pertaining to the house, the danger room, human/mutant relations, and of course the baby Apocalypse. It also contained the statistics and probabilities of every 'doomsday' scenario. As an after thought, Logan had also included all information they had gathered on every enemy and potential enemy they were aware of.

Scott's eyes grew wide, as a serious tone descended on the room and Logan opened the book. Clearing his throat and setting a pair of reading glasses ( for effect) Logan began to read  
" Rule 128 section two of subsection II pertaining to the prevention of the further escalation of the baby apocalypse, it reads; At no time shall any male or female currently residing in the Xavier Institute for Gifted Youngsters, shall be found alone with a member of the opposite gender in any state of undress. Section B. Scott Christopher Summers in particular is to abide by this rules, as he is to date, the greatest violator of the rule. Section C. There shall be no argument or negotiation on this rule. The only members of the household exempt to this rule will be married couples."  
Logan removes his glasses and closes the book as Wade stands pointing a finger at Scott and yelling " VIOLATOR! You disrespecter of the charts! There shall be punishment for this transgression. Were you TRYING to undo the grace period the LeBeaus just gave us?!" Scott blinks at the insane mercenary. He honestly has no idea what the man was talking about. Before he could reply, Wanda again hits him with the dictionary. Normally, at this point John would try to calm his wife, but he was just grateful it wasn't him this time that had angered her. Wade meanwhile had turned back to Remy and Rogue, urging them again to give them twins.

Kitty and Piotr sat quietly in the corner, Piotr wanted to ask if had always been this crazy at 'mutant manor' but he was honestly afraid of either it had always been like this then why did his Katya decide to stay, and if it was new, was it spreading. There was no good they could move away? Wade and Logan, now ignoring Scott, had gone back to their calculations. Remy and Rogue had left, Kurt was watching Kaitlyn, at Wade's insistence. John finally decided to calm his wife. " Wanda. C'mon. Stop hittin him and we can go get some more ice cream." This made her stop, and they left in search of the treat. Kitty shook her head at them all, and Scott looked at her hopefully. But she ignored him and walked out as well, Piotr following her. Kurt finally took pity on scott an untied him, but then glared when Scott attempted to thank him " Oh no. Do not think that I am ever going to side with you on this one." Kurt says, before he poofs away holding his niece.

When the two remaining continued to ignore him, Scott stood to leave as well. Wade whipped around before he took a step. " 0500. Danger room. four hours." Logan says not looking up." Scott nods and runs. Wade asks if Logan had gone soft, and Logan reminds him, that he'd caught them before they had a chance to do anything. Wade nods. Then it would expand beyond the listings of the book, and the charts, to punish him further. And they must obey the charts.

"Now. To deal with the Drakes" Logan states, as he and Wade pour over the charts, graphs,scorecards, and the book, to determine if punishment was necessary. In the end it was decided, as they did not elope to cover a pregnancy, then they only needed to schedule another lecture. Logan then sets off to arrange the paperwork for **OPERATION: ELOPEMENT PREVENTION**. He needed to go to the office supply store. He was nearly out of binders,and blank charts.


	3. Attack Of the Hormones

DISCLAIMER: I do not own X-men Evolution

Chapter Three  
**" Attack... Of the Hormones"**

There is an inner circle designed just for fathers-to-be. These are the men that love their wives or girlfriends. They are there to hold their hair, run to the store in the middle of the night, or just listen to them cry. The rest of the mansion is grateful to these men they keep their wives from killing the rest of them. Scott is excluded from this inner circle. Because he wasn't in the trenches with them. He was to busy flirting with the half-dressed blond. And the others had no problem calling him on it. At all.

Scott tried to come into the meeting room that afternoon. There was a sign on the door that read " FUTURE FATHER'S GUILD" ( Remy's idea). John had chased him off with a flaming alligator. When he went to complain to Logan about the 'unauthorized' club, that was clearly against the rules, and probably the former acolytes plotting something, he was informed that the club had been approved. By himself and Professor Xavier. There was even a "Mother's club" counterpart. But Scott was excluded. Scott sputtered at this, stating " Why should I be excluded! I'm being saddled with a little brat, just the same as them!" This may have been the wrong thing to say, because he was now hiding in Jamie's tree, with him uniform badly singed and tattered. He was hoping that something would distract them so that he could escape.

" Hey! That's MY hiding tree!" Jamie yells up at him. Scott jumped and fell to the ground. Jamie clicked his tongue at Scott and headed up to his usual perch. "... So what did you do this time?" Scott asked. Jamie shrugs. " Accidentally bumped into Rogue, spilled her cocoa, made her cry (that was scary). I decided that the tree was the safest place to sleep tonight." Scott is quiet for a moment, true, Rogue crying was a scary image, but the tree overnight may be over dramatic. He says " So you ran away because she cried?"Jamie shakes his head and states. " No. That would be stupid. Pregnant girls cry all the time according to Logan's charts. I'm hiding because I made GAMBIT'S wife cry. and he found out." Scott shudders at the image. With that the two decided it really was for the best to camp in the woods tonight.

~o~O~o~  
Jean blinks as the bag is removed from her head. " Welcome, initiate, to the Future Mother's Guild". Wanda states standing in front of her. " What?" Jean says. " You are a future mother, and as such, it has been determined, as per The Book, it in titles you to apply for membership into the Guild." Says Rogue from somewhere behind her. Jean asks why they'd kidnapped her to take her a clearly labeled meeting room. Rogue comes over to sit down as Wanda informs her " You had to be blindfolded. All Squad and Guild initiates are forbidden to know the location of the meeting place,until they are members, As per The Book!" Jean stares at Wanda. EVERYBODY knows where the meetings are held. There's huge signs posted on the doors. sighing Jean asks " How long is this going to take? Because I'm hungry." Wanda snaps her fingers and John slips into the room. " What would you like?" Wanda asks casually. " Ummm. Tomato soup. " Jean said. She'd been cooking the soup when they dragged her in here. " The soup and some ice cream, please Darling. Thank you." Jean's jaw dropped, did she just call John Darling?, " Rogue did you want anything?" Wanda asked. She shakes her head, stating that the baby doesn't like food before nine am. John nods and walks back out.

It was after he left Jean states " HEY, why does John get to know where the meeting is?" this having just occurred to her. Rogue rolls her eyes before stating " The Squad and the Guilds are interconnected. Of course he knows where it is. It's on the chart." Jean says then with much sarcasm " Yeah because no one can find it by reading the sign." The other two stare at her blankly for a moment, before beginning the initiation. Which really was just filling in a form stating her name, due date, age, and squad membership. This last one states ineligible due to pregnant single status. It's a prevention Squad after all. Jean finally escapes an hour later; wondering if the others had really fallen under Logan's spell or if it was just an act. Either way, it was scary.

~o~O~o~

The one thing that no one had taken in to account ( with the exception of Logan) when the pregnancy cluster began was how terrifying three pregnant mutants under the same roof would be. It began,of course, with Jean. Between her unexplained boughs of anger, usually followed by crying, and her power spikes, no one was comfortable around her. Of course, thanks to her power spikes, she was well aware of the fact that she was being avoided, which let to more bursts of anger. It really was a vicious cycle. Scott avoiding anything to due with their future child was not helping matters either. This, in turn, then caused everybody in the house to avoid him. Because you didn't want Jean, or Logan, thinking that you were siding with him. At all. Over anything. Emma, however, seemed to have missed the memo.

Wanda soon joined Jean in the hormonal anger and power spikes. She was always angry before pregnancy, leading to a whole new level of terror in the residents. The odd thing was, for most people, that Beast had stated on more than one occasion, unlike Jean Wanda's tests showed no reason for her powers to be spiking. John had been put in charge of keeping his wife calm and happy. This wasn't the easiest thing to do pre-pregnancy, and near impossible now. John simply kept her in a constant supply of ice cream, and steered her away from Scott as much as possible. Scott's mere existence angered her at this point.

Within six weeks of Remy's announcement, his wife had joined the 'hormone club' full force. His first indication of this was one morning, when she asked him if her belly was getting fat. Answering as he felt would be correctly, Remy told her that no, she looked just the same as ever. Then she began to cry. He had no idea why this upset her, but his continued attempts to reassure his wife, resulted in more tears. In desperation, he consulted The Book while she was taking her shower. IT claimed that she WANTED to be 'fat'. Or rather for her pregnancy to be noticed. NEVER use the word 'fat' IT advised. The next morning she asked again, and this time he told her, that he could see a mall baby bump. She sailed around happily the rest of the morning, Much to the relief of the rest of the residents.

But then, the most terrifying thing the residents have ever encountered occurred. It was worse than Kaitlyn, something none of them had ever thought to be possible. Everybody arrived home to find the three women sitting together on the couch, hugging each other and crying. HUGGING EACH OTHER! Rogue and Wanda were willing hugging someone that was not their husband ( or child)! They all froze. This could be very bad. But then Logan came through with one of his charts and muttering to himself, and the spell was broken.

Everyone had been avoiding Logan. He was less than pleased when Kitty and Piotr had elected to travel to Russia to marry. They had, in fact derailed EVERY detail of the chart, except the announcement in the he'd posted it before they had known he was going to. **OPERATION: KITTY'S WEDDING** was null and void. He burned the binder,while he and Wade 'd never had to throw one away before. The couple were supposed to be home today. No one knew what to expect from Logan. On one hand they had not eloped like Bobby and Jubilee. On the other hand they had excluded Logan. Everyone now understood why Rogue and Wanda had just allowed him to take over. It was just easier. For everyone in the house.

Wade was busy calculating again, he now devoted part of everyday weighing Scott's ongoing violation of the chart with the good karma that Rogue had given them. Everyday he would ask Hank to do an ultrasound to determine if it was twins. Hank steadfastly refused, seeing no reason to perform an ultrasound before the second , she was now at ten weeks, Wade was pouting about having to wait.

Scott walked into the living room, and all members of the Squad pointed at him yelling " Violator!" as they tended to do whenever they saw him. Emma had asked him a few times why they did this, but he dodged the question every time. He didn't want her to avoid him to. He had recently asked her out, and they were going to meet at the restaurant, though he had to make an excuse for traveling separately,( He wasn't allowed to take any mansion girl out alone as per rule 143c).

After Scott ducked back out of the room, Emma turned to Amara " Why do they always do that?" Amara shrugs and replies " Cause he dumped Jean when she told him she was pregnant." Emma raised an eyebrow to this. After thinking about it for awhile, she decided that there had to be more to the story than that. Scott didn't seem like the kind who would just leave like that. Plus he NEVER wanted to talk about it. No, she decided, clearly Scott was a victim in this. Nodding to herself, she leaves in search of the guy she foolishly was painting in such a good light.

~o~O~o~

Poitr and Kitty arrived just before dinner, prompting Logan to announce a Anti-Baby Apocalypse Squad meeting that evening. He informed all four couples to be there. The LeBeaus and The Allerdyce's with enthusiasm, the Drakes reluctantly, and The Rasputins with confusion all agreed to be there.

Shortly after dinner they all filed into there clearly labeled 'secret' lair. Wade arrived a moment later, followed quickly by Logan. The meeting began with the Rasputins initiation ( this had become far more organized since the Allerdyces and LeBeaus had joined, thanks to Remy).  
When Logan had finished filing their application forms, and handing them their squad equipment he began the actual meeting. " Okay, first order of business. Kitty, Giant. As soon as you leave tonight I need you to look over the charts to ensure that everything on there was at your wedding. It's okay if it wasn't. We can just redo it if necessary." They nod and roll their eyes. " Next order of business is the Violator. Despite are interference,and punishments, he continues to bother New Girl. The poor thing has no idea what she's getting herself into . We need to protect her from herself and-" Logan is cut off by Wade. " I think they're meeting up somewhere. I saw Violator drive off ten minutes ago, and just now New Girl drove off as well." Logan growls at this , tells Wade to take the floor, and heads out in search of the new couple.

Wade clears his throat and begins " Okay. On to other business, because the blue one is STILL refusing to check, we must operate under the assumption that the twins theory isn't going to happen ( it doesn't work that way, Wanda mutters). Therefore, because Violator is still causing us trouble, the only way to counteract him is simple. Drake,Rasputin you must get pregnant. As soon as possible. In anticipation of this need, I have taken the liberty of removing all forms of birth control from your rooms. Jubilee you can keep your Pills, they've been tictacs for the last month anyway. "

Jubilee frowns in disgust at this while Bobby mutters something about it making since. Kitty rolls her eyes and Piotr asks " Wait. I am confused. How do you stop a baby apocalypse by having babies." Wade and the three other couples turn to him staring. Clearly he had never even paid attention to the charts. Wade explains " The baby apocalypse is created by an unusually high single parent varies married parent differential. Do you EVER pay attention. " He now pulls out Logan's charts to re explain. The other three couples are allowed to go, but Piotr and Kitty are given another two hour lecture, interrupted towards the end by the return of Logan. He had been unable to find the pair. Needless to say he was beyond angry.


	4. The Changing of the Guard

DISCLAIMER: I do not own X-men Evolution

Chapter Four  
**" The Changing of the Guard"**

Emma and Scott did not return until early the next morning. Logan was still up when they came in, together. He was sitting in the wing chair in the parlor. He had rearranged the lighting so that he was partially in shadow, for effect. He had also adopted Xavier's 'steepled fingers'. When they walked in the door he slowly leaned forward, catching their attention as they kissed in the doorway. " I see you have chosen to return." He says in a rather creepy-villan type tone. This made the pair jump apart. " You may go New Girl. You will be in the Danger Room at 0500." Emma scoffs at the hour. It is already three am. " You Violator, will come with me" He continues, ignoring Emma's protests.

Logan leads the frightened young man into Xavier's office. Inviting him to sit, before sitting himself behind the desk. Clearing his throat, he pulls out The Book. Around Five he finally releases the man, so that he can administer the danger room section. Two grueling hours later, Logan heads upstairs for breakfast, telling the couple that they are free to join him. When Emma mumbles something about bed, Logan reminds her that if they had come home prior to curfew, she would have been able to get plenty of sleep.

At breakfast, Jubilee blurts out that she is pregnant. This causes Logan to pull back out his scorecard, and Wade to pull out his controller. The counter descends from the ceiling, making several residents wonder how many he had installed, and he pushes a second button.

Changing the time on it to

16:01:01:10:44:56

before asking Jubilee if it feels 'twinish'. Everybody congratulates the couple, though most are frightened of the idea of a fourth hormonal woman in the house.

~o~O~o~  
Logan walked calmly into Xavier's office, his portfolio of charts under his arm. Charles, looked up from his tea and game. Logan smiles briefly before beginning the lecture, while Charles sighed. Charles had been hoping that with four marries couples in the house,Logan would have calmed down about his charts. Instead the sickness had spread.

Shaking his head at this thought Xavier tried to pay attention to what Logan was saying. He didn't recognize the charts Logan had set up, so they must be new. Logan had now dragged out The Book, pocket edition, and was quoting from it. Xavier mused over the fate of his friend. When exactly had the man gone insane? Was there something Charles could have done to prevent it?

Logan, at this point realized that Charles was no longer paying attention. So he decided now was a good time to just get to the point. " I'm just sayin' think about it Chuck! It's already with in the parameters of The Book, or I wouldn't bring it up. All the charts agree as well." Charles blinks at him. Whatever it is he's trying to say, of course is already in that book and charts! Logan wrote them! What was he talking about anyway? " Please Logan, just tell what it is you're trying to say." Xavier states finally. Logan sighs. Charles clearly had been drinking again.

" I said Charles, That I think it may be time for you to retire. Think about it. I'm far better equipped to deal with what is coming. One infant turned you into a drunk hiding all the time! What is half a dozen going to do to you?" Logan says as Xavier pales. "...What do you mean? Kaitlyn's our only infant."  
Logan shakes his head at Charles. How long had it been since he'd left his office anyway? Between the couples and the way Scott carried on there were soon going to need to open a nursery school. " Chuck, Jean,Wanda,Jubilee, and Anna are all pregnant. More than likely Kitty and Emma are not far behind." Charles pales further. When had this happened? Why hadn't he been informed? Who was Anna ? Clearly Logan knew far more about what was going on than he did. Kaitlyn was scary enough, the idea of at least four more was... well he couldn't even think of a word scary enough.

Charles signed the paperwork handing the school over to Logan, then he called Erik, and invited him on vacation. Erik was about to be a grandfather. He needed a vacation too.

With Charles gone,mumbling to himself the entire way to the cab, Logan decided the most important job to begin with was to reorganize the classes. They were to get an influx of new students next month, and he honestly couldn't remember the last time a class was held here aside from sex-ed. But with most of the students now graduated, it would be reasonable that they could run the school as a school. He of course, also had no intention of disbanding The Squad. Sitting in what is now his office, Logan gets to work on his newest set of charts.

~o~O~o~  
The next morning, a new chart had appeared in the kitchen, Livingroom, bathrooms, war room, and everywhere else Logan had thought to post it. As everyone gathered around and read it, Jean read aloud ( for those to far back to see)

**TEACHER/COURSES FOR THIS SEMESTER**  
**1. Logan-Headmaster/Chart-Bearer/Danger Room instructor**  
**2. Wade-Head Teacher/ Obstacle Course instructor**  
**3. Remy- Foreign Language(French)**  
**4. Rogue- English**  
**5. John-Literature**  
**6. Wanda-Mathematics**  
**7. Piotr-Art**  
**8. Kitty-Computer Lab**  
**9. Jubilee-Health**  
**10. Bobby- Gym**  
**11. Scott- History**  
**12. Jean-Home Economics**  
**13. Emma- Ethics**  
**14. Ororo-Guidance Counselor**  
**15. Henry-Science**  
**16. Charles-Guidance Counselor**

**PLEASE COME TO THE HEADMASTER'S OFFICE AFTER BREAKFAST TO COLLECT YOUR ROOM ASSIGNMENTS AND MATERIALS. THANK YOU, STAFF.**

Everyone stared at the chart for a moment, partly because Logan was Headmaster, partly because many had forgotten Scott's name, and a few because Wade was head teacher. Clearly Logan had lost his mind. As some began to voice this opinion, others wondered if it was even allowed.  
This last question was cleared up quickly by Squad Members Rogue,Remy,Wanda, and John who had just arrived in the kitchen. They simply stated ( together, because that wasn't creepy at all) " As per Subsection A of Charter F, line 556, subsection 32... At anytime the prior Headmaster feels he can no longer give his proper attention to the School,He may appoint a new Headmaster in his stead. As per rule 2 section 1 line 12... All teaching positions will be assigned by the Headmaster." They then went to eat their breakfasts, as the rest of the household stared. That was there was point in questioning the book. That just caused trouble.  
By that afternoon, the new staff were all busy setting up their new class rooms. Kaitie was 'helping ' Rogue set up the bookshelves in her room, but Remy came and offered to take her as he was already finished in his room next door. At dinner they all marveled at how organized the set up was. When Scott questioned the potential problem of credentials of the staff, Wade and Remy proudly displayed the paperwork they had arranged. Everything was in order.

~o~O~o~

To date no one outside of the Squad had seen any version of The Book other than Scott. As said previously, The Book was something of a legend amongst most of the students and was said that each Squad member had a copy, and this was why they could quote from it as they do. ( They,in fact each have two copies, one pocket edition and one desk edition) However the six original members have The Book memorized.

One evening,about two days before the new students were due to arrive, they all finally got to see a glimpse of IT. Or rather the pocket edition. The Squad walked into the Rec room, to find Tabitha and Sam kissing on the couch. This caused Remy to pull out the pocket edition of The Book. Clearing his throat he opened IT, as Wade turned down the lights and Wanda handed him a flashlight. Light shining eerily on his face he read.  
" Rule 127 At no time shall any unmarried couple engage in any form of physical contact inside school grounds. This does not pertain to physical contact acceptable in Danger Room sessions."

Wade turns back up the lights. Remy closes The Book and hands the flashlight back to Wanda he continues " You will report to the Danger Room at 0700. You will then report to the Headmaster's office to determine if any further punishment is required. As this is your first offence, and it was a minor violation,I presume that it will be sufficient."

Sam and Tabitha both protest that they had no idea it was against the rules. This was a mistake, as the rules pertaining to anything handled by the Squad were listed on neatly labeled charts and hung throughout the school. By claiming ignorance,they were admitting to not reading the Charts. It may have been easier on them to admit to intentionally ignore the rules. Realizing their mistake, the couple ran. They locked themselves in their rooms, and hoped that they would be over it by morning.


	5. And Baby Makes Four

DISCLAIMER: I do not X-men Evolution

Chapter Five  
**"And Baby Makes Four"**

Rogue and Remy headed down to the med-lab, Kaitlyn in tow, they had finally agreed to have an ultrasound,hoping it would make Wade calm down. Hank had reluctantly agreed as well. Kaitie was busy playing with a jar from Hank's counter, when Hank came in. He cleared his throat and the couple looked up. He didn't actually complain about the toddler playing with his equipment,however. Because he still feared both the child and her short-tempered parents.

He preformed the ultrasound quickly,confirming that they were having only one child. This will disappoint Wade and Logan. The two had become obsessed with twins. Wanda and John were also stubbornly having a single child ( though the men had felt theirs didn't have as many 'karma' points anyway, as she was pregnant at the wedding). On the plus side ( according to Wade) Jean to was having a single child. They were still holding out hope for Jubilee and Kitty. Jubilee was not due an ultrasound yet, and Kitty was stubbornly not yet pregnant at all.

Wade and Logan were waiting (impatiently) outside the lab. Both were disappointed to see a singleton picture, but excitedly happy to learn the child was perfectly healthy. Rogue and Remy then went upstairs to talk with John and Wanda and play with their daughter. School would be starting tomorrow, and they wanted to have fun while they could.  
~o~O~o~

Kurt arrived while the couples were sitting on the front lawn. Kaitie saw her uncle, and squealing, poofed herself to him. He suppressed his scream, letting out only a slight whine, at the unexpected arrival of his niece. He handed the child back to her father as he asked " So what did I miss this week?"

" Well, Logan's in charge now, no one is having twins yet,Wade's mad about it, saying that John and Remy didn't try hard enough. He's holding out hope for Piotr and we're all teacher's now Katie has eight teeth and we're getting 23 new students tomorrow. This is officially a private school now, they don't have to go to Bayville High,lucky brats." Rogue says. At the idea of Twenty-Three students Kurt pales,suddenly glad he left when he did. Then he asks how they all got to be teachers anyway " After all, most of you just graduated. Did Remy even graduate?" This makes Remy mad ( he hates when people question his intelligence or education level). " I will have you know ,Kurt, I DID graduate. Just because I was home schooled by an organized crime family does not mean I'm uneducated, or stupid!" He gets up walking off in a huff. Rogue turns to her brother,who gulps, and screams " NOW LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE! YOU WILL GO APOLOGIZE TO MY HUSBAND IMMEDIATELY!" before struggling to her feet and following Remy, Kaitie on her hip.

He turns to the others, hoping they can explain what he said wrong, however, John glares pointedly at him,while Wanda fishes the dictionary out of her bag. Before he can remember why that is a bad thing,Wanda smacks him in the head with it. She then stalks off mumbling about idiot brothers. John then states " You need to go make it right with my brother,furball, or Rogue'll be an only child" He then smacks Kurt as Wade (who had walked up to see why the 'preggos' were mad) states " Actually they have another brother anyway." before asking what Kurt had done. After John explains Wade turns to Kurt. " Because you are the Striped one's brother, I will go easy on you. You have a thirty second head start." Kurt gulps as Wade pulls out a stopwatch and poofs away.

Rogue goes to their room, where she knows her husband hides when he's angry. There or the danger room, but it was still occupied by the couple being punished, speaking of which,she needed to remember to go let those two out... oh well she'll get to it in a few minutes. Remy is staring at the ceiling, while focusing on not killing his brother-in-law. ONE freakin' sensitive subject. Just one that pissed him off this bad, and Kurt had to go jump on it. He says this to his wife while she set the baby next to him, she replied " Well to be fair, that one subject DOES encompass your entire childhood. No worries, I'm the same way." He laughs at this, and begins to tickle Kaitie, who is soon squealing and squirming all over the bed. Awhile later, the three head down to let the couple out of the danger room.

On the way down,they watched Kurt rush past screaming, followed by Wade. They watch them run past before Remy asks if he should go help Kurt... or Wade. Rogue shakes her head and they just take the elevator. They release the exhausted couple, who glare pointedly,but wisely say nothing, then escort them to Logan's office.

Logan is busy writing out several new charts when they come in, He sets aside his Sharpie as they explain both the crime and the punishment. Tabitha and Sam smirk, clearly thinking that the others will be in trouble for forgetting them... and they would've been... if Xavier was still in charge... or here. But he's not. And everyone knows how Logan feels about those who disrespect the charts. To date, the only couple in the school who have done nothing to violate the charts are Remy and Rogue.

Therefore, as far as Logan is concerned, they were the household experts and as such the only one EVER allowed to question their methods was Logan himself. It was on the Chart. The newest one. In fact, questioning their methods was punishable by a danger room session. He tells them to be there after dinner. Dumbfounded the younger couple stare at him. Does he make this stuff up as he goes, or does he really anticipate their every move? Either way it's creepy. Creepier still was how the LeBeaus never broke any of his rules. He must give them a heads up or something.

About that time, Kaitie became bored. After she set the drapes and the bookshelf alight, her parents decide it's time to feed her. Logan calmly puts out the fires as he continues to stare at the younger couple. Finally he states " You are both seniors this year. I expect you to lead by example. Especially you, Sam. Your sister will be joining you. Do you really want her contributing to the Baby Apocalypse? How would your mother feel about that? As you can see from the following chart. Sibling groups tend to help escalate the clusters. They tend to follow suit when elder siblings become part of the problem." He pulls out another set of charts continuing his lecture. It was going to be a long year. A very long year.

* * *

A/N: Yeah...parts of this chapter weren't as funny as the rest of the story,I apologize.


	6. New Arrivals

Chapter Six  
_A/N: None of the twenty-three new students are OCs, I grabbed names from various generations and put them together. :)_

DISCLAIMER: I do not own X-men evolution.  
_**New Arrivals**_

At promptly Seven am the staff all stood on the front porch awaiting the arrival of the new students. The older students had been drug outside and made to stand in the orientation area. Slowly the new arrivals began to trickle in. There were several signs posted throughout the yard, One with the incoming procedure ( that had also been mailed to the students) one clearly labeling where to leave luggage, and one labeling where to wait for orientation. For the most part, the new arrivals followed the charts, Logan was pleased with this. Maybe this crowd would be easier than the last one. They seemed to be respecters of the charts. There were one or two who had become confused, but were quickly set straight by the older students.  
By Eight the last of them had arrived, kissed their families, and stored their things. The gates were re-closed and Logan began.

" Welcome Students, to a new year at the Xavier Institute for Gifted I am sure you have noticed,by simply looking at the group gathered here, there are very few students in this school. There are only Twenty-Nine of you to be exact. This allows for smaller class sizes and greater teacher/student will also notice,I am sure, that the majority of the staff are close to your age. This does not give you permission to undermine your teachers in anyway. They are in charge here. That is not up to negotiation. The rules of the institute have been posted through out the school. I strongly suggest you read them. Ignorance of the rules is not only not an excuse,it is a violation of the rules. When we are finished here, Mr Wilson will perform roll call, and then Mr LeBeau and Mr Allerdyce will hand out your uniforms and class schedules. You will then be assigned your room number by Mrs LeBeau, she's the easy one to spot, she is holding her daughter Kaitlyn. Mr LeBeau and Mr Allerdyce are over by the long table so you will have no trouble finding them either. When you receive your paperwork you will then return to this spot and wait for Mrs Allerdyce,Ms Grey,Mrs Raspitin, or Ms Frost to assign you your guidance counselor and issue you your student map."

Wade clears his throat and Reads  
_**Abbott ,Hope**_ (Here)  
_**Aldine,Ruth**_(present)  
_**Aquilla, Amara**_ ( I was at breakfast,duh. AMARA. Sorry Here)  
**_Borkowski,Victor_**( present)  
**_Carter , Ray_** ( huh? oh right 'here')  
**_Cohuelo,Gabriel_ **( Here)  
_**Collins, Laurie**_ (Here)  
_**Dane ,Lorna** _(Here)  
_**Espinoza, Angelo** _(*mumbles* here)  
_**Foley,Josh** _(Present)  
_**Green,Sidney**_ (Present)  
**_Guthrie,Paig__e_**( Here )  
**Gurthie, Sam**(Still here)  
_**Gwynn,Megan**_(here)  
_**Ichiki, Hisak****o**_( Present)  
**Keller,Julian**( whatever)  
_**Kincaid, Cessily**_(Here)  
_**Kinney ,Laura**_( Present,sir)  
_**Madrox, James**_( Can I play with Kaitie later? NO. Fine. Here)  
_**Rasputin, Illyana**_( Here? I believe)  
_**Ramsey, Dougla****s**_(Present)  
_**Richter, Julio**_(Here)  
_**Sinclair, Rahne**_( Umm yes?)  
_**Smith, Tabitha**_( Wish I wasn't)  
_**Starsmore, Jonothon**_( Here)  
_**Thomas, Everett**_( Here)  
**_Vale, Jessica_**(Here)  
_**Vale, Sarah**_(present)  
_**Washington, Roxy**_ ( here)

They then all line up and receive their various items. Sam is trying to avoid his sister announcing loudly that they are related. Lorna is staring strangely at Wanda. Julien asks if Remy's accent is 'real'. Jamie is pouting over Katie,Illyana is waving frantically at her brother and sister-in-law. Logan drug Tabitha,Amara,Julien, Rahne, and Jamie off to the side after everyone re-gathers to explain that they are only allowed to say here or present at roll call.  
~o~O~o~

Three hours later, everyone has found their rooms, and their home room teachers, for the tours, and are now sitting down for brunch. Logan has just settled at the head table when Kitty leans over and whispers to him and Wade " You'll be pleased to know that I learned this morning that I'm pregnant." "YES! " The two men scream before they pull out their score cards and Wade again calls down the clock. Several of the new students stare shocked at the ceiling, while Tabitha and Amara yell " Kitty, Your pregnant?!" and Wade asks her if it feels 'twinish' before shoving the couple out the door, yelling for them to make twins.

A stunned silence falls on the new student body, what had they gotten in to? Slowly everyone resumes their meals, Paige leans over to Sam and whispers " Why would you want to be here with these crazy people?" Before Sam can respond Scott, feeling rather put out over being left out of all the clubs, yells at Sam " Did you not recently get in trouble for having contact with the opposite sex, yet your doing it again?!" Wade walks up to Scott, Scott still red-faced, and the student body stunned. " VIOLATOR! One You are NOT a member of the ABA, Two You are the greatest violator in the school! AND THREE that is Paige GURTHIE! READ YOUR BLOODY NOTES MAN! You look like a damn idiot!" At this point Logan stands " Wade, Language. Violator Danger room, four hours!." Scott looked appalled as he stammered " But,but" Wanda then annoyed pulled the dictionary out of her purse and smacked him with it.

Rogue says calmly " I've been meaning to ask, Why do you not use the spoon Mattie gave you?" Wanda looks at her blankly for a moment before saying " Spoons are for those you love." Before walking out of the room. Rogue nods in agreement and follows behind,carrying Kaitie. Remy and John then shook their heads at Scott. Why did the idiot have to always upset the women? Logan cleared his throat, assigned Scott clean up duty, and then informed the students that they had the afternoon to explore the grounds.

~o~O~o~

Rogue smiled when she saw Kurt walk into the Rec room. Kurt on the other hand,froze when he saw a collection of new kids gathered around his sister and niece Clearly,these poor kids had not been informed. His niece was scary. ...and his sister was dangerous, okay maybe dangerous was unfair... but she was scary too.

" Hey, what are you two up to?" Kurt asks,ignoring the students. Rogue shrugs and says, " Giving Kaitie room to move around, or trying to. Our suite is to small to really run in." Kurt nods and Rogue continues. " 'sides Remy's trying to catch a nap before he has to make dinner. Are you staying?" Kurt loved Remy's cooking. Everybody knew that. On the other hand, Remy could hold a grudge, and it had only been a couple days...

" ...is he still mad?" Kurt asks. Rogue shakes her head. She starts to ask him to stay , when Kaitie trips over one of the students feet. Jonothon? She believes, and falls down. Immediately the baby begins to cry. Sighing Rogue comforts her daughter while she puts out the fire. The new students sit in stunned silence,Kurt slips away. Logan walks in and pulls out a clipboard to note what needs to be replaced,while muttering about the budget. Rogue smiles at the students and goes to wake her husband.


	7. Staff Meeting

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN X-MEN EVOLUTION!

Chapter Seven  
**Staff Meeting**

Logan called the first staff meeting of the year the evening the new students arrived. He asked Kurt ( who had decided to stay for dinner) to watch the children. Rogue assured him this didn't include Kaitie so he agreed. Rogue,Remy and Kaitie were the first to arrive, as usual, followed by Wanda and John. Logan came in a moment later, with a brand new set of charts. Kitty,Jubilee,Bobby and Jean arrived together, Jean was waddling at this point. Piotr and Hank came in before Jean could sit down. Ororo quietly followed. Charles hasn't returned from vacation. Emma comes in a moment later, eyes red-rimmed, and a snarl on her face. Wade followed silently. Finally Scott walked in as well.

After everybody was seated, Logan began with " Okay, we have twenty-nine kids here with us this year. Now this is really a Anti Baby Apocalypse Squad issue, but I'm going to bring it up to everyone. We need to keep them away from each other...or we risk the Baby Apocalypse. I'm going to hold the first lecture of the year tomorrow morning, but as we have seen before, children rarely see the awesome responsibility of THE CHARTS! Last year the only ones who took head of the charts were Remy and Rogue. For the most part I will give you the rest were at least somewhat cautious. No-" Logan is cut off by Scott's snort.

Everybody turns to stare at the man. " You got something to say Violator?" Wade asks. " Yeah, only that Remy and Rogue didn't trust the charts anymore than anyone else, they were just scared of Logan. And how do we know what they were up to when they were at Remy's apartment, or their SHARED room for that matter?" Logan turns red-faced as does Remy. Before Logan can respond Remy is punching Scott in the nose while stating " Do NOT challenge my wife's honor; just because you're a slut doesn't mean everybody else is. It would not surprise me at all when you dump Blondie after you knock her up! YOU don-"Remy is cut off by Emma " He already has."

The group collectively looks at her. She repeats. " He already has. I told him after dinner that I'm pregnant. He told me and I quote ' What is with you sluts,I told you and the last one I don't want kids' and then he dumped me." Everybody turns back to Scott,who has paled now that they all know. Jean is livid,slut really?! Remy was still standing over Scott. So he punches him a second time. Wade calls down the countdown timer. Frowning at their fate. Logan pulls out his score card the same frown on his fate. Rogue hands Jean Kaitie and the Squad drags Scott away. Jean turns to Emma and tells her she sorry that Scott's an idiot. Emma returns the gesture and Wade continues to grumble. Scott's scream can be heard at a distance.

A few minutes later the Squad returns and they resume the meeting. Logan stands back in front of his charts and says " Now as I was saying, Tomorrow morning I will give the weekly lecture. Because I know the lecture tends to run over, as there are always those that are so enthralled I'd hate to cut them short, regular classes will begin Monday. Does anyone have any concerns for the weekend?"

~o~O~o~

Logan knew that there were now another sixteen girls who could at any time begin the baby Apocalypse right here at the school. But he COULD stop it all he had to do was keep the boys and girls apart... all the time. If they didn't see each other they couldn't talk to each other. If they didn't talk to each other, then they couldn't date each other. It was a perfect plan... except he needed to train them to fight together. Darn. Okay it could still work. Just as long as they weren't allowed to interact to much...except how was he to stop them from talking to each other after classes? Darn again. Okay so back to plan A. The Charts. He just had to make them understand the charts.

Maybe if he taped Jean's delivery and made them all watch it that would scare them. The charts did say that it would scare them strait. Hopefully Jean would let him film it. He'd talk to her tomorrow. In the mean time, he must patrol the halls. As he walked down the hall, mumbling about the charts he spotted Wade coming the opposite way, doing the same. Wade informs him that he saw Violator drive off a few minutes before, but no one had left before or after so the risk was minimal in his opinion. Maybe he'd finally learned his lesson... they hoped.

And soon was born the most important Binder to date: **Operation: Keep Violator from Breeding**. Everyone in the Squad carried a copy of the binder on their person at all times. New charts were posted through out the school. He was banned from any interaction with any member of the opposite sex in the school. They felt secure in their efforts. He would be unable to break The Rules again.

Any time he was seen even looking at a female resident,a whistle was blown. Followed by a three hour long Danger room session, and a two hour lecture for him. For any female in question, she received an addition four hours lecture,but was not given the danger room session. Needless to say, the girls of the mansion avoided him like the plague. The plan was fool proof. So of course there were breaches. Because the man in question still saw nothing wrong with what he had done. To either woman. Nor did he see anything wrong with flirting occasionally with Elizabeth, who was there on a part time basis as a favor to Xavier while he is on vacation. Luckily for her, She seemed to see right through him and avoided him whenever possible. He quickly bored with the one sided flirtation and moved on, much to her relief.


	8. Births: Round One

Chapter Eight  
**Births: Round One**  
~o~O~o~  
_Nathan Christopher Grey-Summers_

A few days after Thanksgiving, the Apocalypse began. Jean's water broke in the middle of the night; and she went to Logan's door (he was the closest) . He took her to the Med-Lab after sounding the Baby Apocalypse alarm. Alerting everyone to the imminent arrival of the first mansion birth. This alarm was formally used to inform them if there was an attack... but no one had attacked them since Apocalypse was defeated years ago(...some theorized that boredom was the reason for Logan's insanity).

After informing the student body that there was no attack, and to return to bed, Rogue,Wanda,Kitty,Jubilee,Emma,and Storm went to sit with Jean downstairs(along with Amara and Tabitha). Remy,Piotr,Wade,John,Bobby, and Charles (who had arrived home the evening before) sat in the living room waiting for news. Scott had returned to bed along with the students. Wade was once again considering the likelihood of being able to assassinate the little jerk and get away with it from was against the book, however, if Wade presented Logan with a chart...

The girls,aside from Ororo rejoined them an hour later. This was going to take awhile. Remy was shuffling a deck,John was pacing and flicking his lighter. Piotr was sketching something,Bobby was making tiny snowmen,Charles was rubbing his temples while Wade explained how to kill a man with a shoelace. Rogue was feeding Kaitie,Wanda was watching John and rubbing her belly (she's nearly eight months herself now),Kitty and Amara were giggling about babies,Jubilee was chewing gum and texting,Emma was scowling at Scott's absence, and Tabitha was napping in the corner.

Logan walked in a moment later, and asked where Scott was. Everyone simply replies "Bed" and Logan growls before heading back out. A few minutes later they all hear Scott's scream coming towards them, Kaitie begins whimpering, which causes everyone but Remy,Rogue and Wade to back away from the toddler. Wade claps his hands,hoping she'll light up his sword again. Remy goes to shut Scott up( They hear him in the hall scream " Stop scaring my daughter you inconsiderate ass!" before the sounds of repeated smacks) Rogue tries to calm her daughter as Logan drags Scott into the room, followed closely by Remy who is still threatening Scott with a book.

Wade starts to say something to Scott,but whatever it was is lost to Emma's screaming. She smacked her ex-boyfriend on the head with the book she stole from a shocked Remy while screaming that he was the most selfish inconsiderate person she had ever known,and how dare he sleep while his son was being born?! Now as we all have already learned about Scott... he rivals Jamie in angering the people of the house. One may assume that he enjoys being tortured and/or treed. It is the only explanation for his statement. " Supposed."

A silence descends on the room before Logan asks " What was that?!" Scott straitened his shirt before stating again " Supposed son. Everyone here is operating under the assumption that Jean...and Emma's children are mine. But how do we really know? I mean look at them, you can't honestly believe that I was the only guy sleeping with either one of them" The chaos that resulted from this statement was huge...this was worse than the whole "EX" thing he'd pulled before.

Wade was begging to be allowed to kill him,Logan appeared to be considering Wade's request, John and Remy were doing their best to calm their wives (both didn't like them fighting in their current conditions) Emma was beating Scott with her shoe, Kitty had threatened to phase a certain part of his anatomy through a wall..leaving the rest of him behind. This caused both Emma and Tabitha to laugh and say " You'll need a microscope to find it" This did briefly make everyone pause to look at Tabitha, before returning to Scott.

They all were still screaming when Ororo cleared her throat from the doorway. When everyone looked at her she stated " Nathan Christopher Grey- Summers is here." There was a brief silence,followed by a chorus of cheers( even an apocalypse baby is still a baby, and so they celebrate), interrupted by the resident idiot's complaints about her using his name on the child. A brief thunderstorm finally shut him up.  
Several of the women asked if they could go see her, but were informed that Hank was only letting in three at a time. And that Jean really wanted to see Scott,Rogue, and Emma first. This surprised Rogue. She and Jean weren't exactly best friends. Scott refused to go, so Wanda wandered downstairs with them.

Jean had wanted Kaitie to see the new baby. Plus she liked Rogue... she didn't seem to even know that Rogue didn't really like her. Rogue had not treated her any different than she had before when the mood swings and powers issue arose. Wanda hadn't either. That's why she felt closest to these girls. Emma... was carrying her son's brother or sister. It was for the best if they could get along. As such she and Emma had begun hanging out awhile ago. After all it wasn't like Emma 'stole' Scott from her.

~o~O~o~

After everyone had seen the new baby, and settled the kids into busy work for the day, Hank ordered all pregnant girls back to bed. Wanda and Rogue gratefully headed out. Kitty and Jubilee quickly followed. Emma stood and was about to leave when apparently Tabitha and Amara both decided taking a nap was the best way to announce their pregnancies. This, of course caused an uproar amongst the staff. How had not one but two girls gotten pregnant with everyone watching their every move?

Wade and Logan pulled out the charts and began calculating again. Remy and John were both pacing and rating about the beginning of the end. Emma went ahead and left for a nap, as did the girls who started the trouble. Scott used the opportunity to escape. He knew that the you-know-what was going to hit the fan as soon as Sam stated...yeah that " But how can Tabby be...we haven't... but" This causes them all to freeze and look collectively at Sam and then Scott ( who was almost to the door). Scott ran. This pretty much admitted guilt. Sam went from confused to livid. Ray was already planning how to ask Amara to marry him. Now he was going to do it early. This pleased Wade,Logan,Remy, and John.

Scott packed his bags while they were all distracted. He needed a vacation. He was going to go visit his brother. Though several people noticed him leaving, bags fully packed, no one said anything to him. Jean and Emma were both still pissed at him. Tabitha was relieved, now maybe she could patch things up with Sam. Logan and Wade had decided to give him the boot anyway. Logan walks by ordering the announcement for Amara and Ray's wedding as Scott walks out the door. Logan glares at him but says nothing.

After hanging up, Logan consults the charts to determine who would take over Scott and Jean's classes. According to the charts, when a mother gives birth, the husband is to take over her duties for her. But Scott had left (thankfully) so both slots needed to be filled. Finally settling on himself for Scott(History,how hard could it be, he was there for most of it...he thinks...maybe) and Rogue for Jean( home economics... somewhere nearby Remy just did a happy dance), he goes to tell her.

~o~O~o~

_William Thomoas Allerdyce_

Wanda was teaching a lesson on complex algorithms when her water broke, to a chorus of ewws and yells. Laura( the only student who wasn't freaked out by the whole thing) immediately goes to find John, who gets her to the med-lab. Just like two weeks before, classes were canceled and the staff gathered to await the news. John stayed by his wife's side through out the whole ordeal. Though when he saw the needle for her epidural, he passed out.

Remy learned of this later, and spent the next week laughing every time he saw John. John said repeatedly in response that he was sure that Remy would have a similar reaction when John's 'nephew' comes. Of course, this leads to another round of "we're not brothers" argument.  
Regardless of whether or not (they're not) they were brothers,Remy still found himself nervous and worried. Some pace when nervous. Others ramble. Remy shuffles... and makes weird inappropriate comments. It's just who he is. Rogue doesn't mind... even Rogue can only stand so many jokes and comments.

After three hours of the most off the wall rumor she'd ever heard from her husband she finally snaps " Remy! I KNOW you're nervous but if you make ONE more crack about birthing or breastfeeding you WILL sleep on the couch until Oli get's here!" This statement is punctuated with her pulling out the spoon Mattie had given her and waving it at her husband. He pales and mumbles that he will behave before sitting down.

A silence descends on the everyone was grateful he had finally shut up, they were also all very afraid of Rogue standing there wielding the spoon. Finally the silence is broken by Bobby ( who it seemed decided he wanted his medal back) making the 'whipped' noise at Remy.

Storm finally came upstairs about four hours after Wanda's water broke to announce the birth of William Thomoas Allerdyce. This again was met with a chorus of cheers. Though they also all feared that there would be further 'future birth' announcements, none came. Much to the relief of everyone in the Squad. Maybe all of their fail safe's were finally working. However, Logan still felt the need to pull all the students into an impromptu' babies are dangerous' lecture.

Meanwhile, Rogue and Remy went down to see their friends' new son. Rogue herself still had several months to wait for the birth of her son, as did Jubilee and Emma. Kitty, Tabitha,and Amara had even longer to wait.

* * *

**A/N: **  
**Tabitha,Sam,Amara,and Ray are all are eighteen,as are Jubilee and Bobby ... Kitty,Rogue and Wanda are nineteen. and Scott,Jean,Remy,John,Piotr, and Emma are twenty in this story. So Scott's an $$ but not a pervert... Except she's still a student...yeah I hate this Scott.**


	9. Never give Jamie candy

DISCLAIMER: I Do not own X-men Evolution

Chapter Nine  
**And that is why you should never give Jamie candy**

Logan stood before the entire population of the school. They stared at the feral man, as he continues to mutter to himself as swayed back and forth. Finally, when the silence became to much for him,John cleared his throat. At this Logan snaps out of his reverie and claps his hands towards Wade, who in turn brings Logan The Book. The original book. Not the desk or pocket addition, but the original leather-bound Book...the one no one had ever seen outside the Squad ( nor had everyone in the Squad seen it). There was a collective gasp when the Book appeared.

Wade stands back as Logan pulls out his glasses. There is now absolute silence. Even the three babies are quiet. Their mothers didn't even have to coach them to be, as if they could since the solum nature of the meeting. Just as John began feeling the urge to fidget, Logan began.  
" There is NEVER a reason to ignore ANY rule in the Book. To blatantly ignore a rule from the Book and the Chart borders on outright insubordination. Ms. Gwynn has not only violated a fundamental rule. She violated a rule that puts us all in very real danger. If she had bothered to listen to the beginning of the year speech,this would never have happened. The first five rules of the Book pertain entirely to the long term survival of each and every member of not only this house, but the World!"

"I'm sorry I saw no harm in-" Megan stutters.  
" Silence!" Logan commands." You clearly have NEVER even glanced at the charts! You may as well have murdered us all!"  
"Bb-but it was only a Hersey's kiss" Megan mumbles  
" And yet we can all see the result! We still haven't figured out which is the original, or if we've captured him yet!" John screams.

Clearing his throat,Logan now opens the Book" Article One,Rule Three pertaining to the safety of the school... At NO time shall any member of the institute, student or staff, give Jamie ANY form of sugar. Especially not chocolate. Violation of this rule can result up to and included immediate expulsion of the violator." Closing the Book and removing the glasses he then turns back to Megan, who gulps.

" How is it possible that you were unaware of this rule Ms Gwynn, it is on the first page of the student handbook! Ignorance of the rules is against the rules!" Logan has reached a new level of terrifying at this point. The girl's friends are more than willing to distance themselves from her. After what had happened, no one was sure they ever wanted to speak to her again.

~TWO HOURS AGO~

Jamie was sitting in the Living room, he is staring out the window and sighing every few minutes. It just wasn't fair. Wanda and Jean were just as stingy with their sons as Rogue was with Kaitie. Jamie had been hopeful, that now that Kaitie was getting bigger, and Rogue was having a new baby, she would finally let him play with the baby. But if anything, she was even more stingy than she used to be. Ever since he tried to show Kaitie the pretty kitties at the zoo... How was supposed to know that visitors weren't allowed to pet the lions?

But apparently, according to John and Remy, it wasn't allowed. There really was no reason for them to yank Kaitie away from him like that when he tried to open the cage door. It's a cat, what's the worse that could happen? And then John threatened to beat him up. John! Since when does John even try to be rational. Hypocrite. They are all so boring now.

Megan, Paige, and Laura had just walked into the room. They saw Jamie pouting in the window seat, and after a brief paper-rocks-scissors battle, Megan went over to check on the boy. He explained how they never ever let him play with Kaitie, and how unfair and stingy they were. Megan felt bad for the boy. She'd never really spoken to him before, but he seemed so sweet and sad. Maybe he was just lonely.  
She held the bag of candy to him, and at first he refused, stating he wasn't allowed. She then urged him to take one. What could happen with one candy?

~ FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER~

The three girls sit terrified while four "Jamies" are trying to explain the story of meeting Kaite, however, each is at a different part of the story, and are bouncing around the room at the same time, so they have no idea what's being said.

Seven more Jamies ran out of the room in search of Rogue's donut stash and Wanda's Ice cream stash. Three more had gone in search of Kaitie. Eleven others had run upstairs to find some more kids to play with. Four were fighting with each other on the front lawn.

Logan came out of his office to learn who had started this mess, stepping past a whimpering Kurt who was currently under six Jamies and headed in the direction of the Living room where they seem to pour out of.

Remy was threatening several Jamies with his staff while Rogue hid behind him, spoon in in one hand and Kaitie in the other. Wanda and John had locked themselves and William in their bathroom, several Jamies pounding on the door. Jean had hidden Nathan from more Jamies and was holding the door and windows to her room closed with her powers.

Wade came rushing out of the shower, mask on,towel wrapped around his waist, wielding his plastic swords. He began frantically beating down Jamies on his way to the alarm button. They needed to lock down before any escaped. Jubilee screamed that it was late while pulling on her hair and pointing to the television. A horde of Jamies had descended on downtown. Remy and John managed to get the Jamies into the danger room while Piotr,Bobby,Kurt,Logan,Wade( now dressed),And several students headed downtown to capture the rest.

An hour later, they had managed to capture and remove to the danger room, a total of thirty-nine Jamies. It was then, as John,Remy,Wade,Bobby,Ray,and Piotr chased down the last of the Jaimies, that Logan demanded to know who had given Jamie chocolate. It was the only explanation for what had just happened.

This was nearly as bad as the now infamous Halloween Incident. NOBODY wanted to go through that again... Kitty and Rogue were Still in therapy. It was never spoken of. EVER! But it had been the rule ever since. XAVIER was the one who ruled it so. Logan agreed.

Megan hesitantly raised her hand. She had given the boy a single Hersey's Kiss. How could a single candy have caused all of this? Xavier was busy calling airlines. No one was sure if he was booking for Megan , or himself.. or Jamie. Everyone was starting to clean up the grounds and building.

Logan stated they were having a meeting in fifteen minutes and then dragged off the mothers and infants to ensure they were safe. The remaining adults were searching the grounds to ensure they had found all the Jamies.

PRESENT

Logan stood before the frightened and traumatized girl. Logan decided that her trauma was punishment enough, so he would not expel her. However, she would be grounded for the next four weeks. They were waiting for the sugar rush to wear off the Jamies to determine if they had them all. John had tried, at one point to ask the orignal Jamie to please step forward. Apparently they all felt that they were the original . Kurt had returned home, swearing he was never coming back to the mansion. ever.

Hank was able to determine who the first Jamie was, and after they pulled him out, they sealed the danger room until the side effects wore off and Jamie was able to pull them all back. Everyone went to bed early that night completely drained from the days events.

A/N: warning this chapter may induce insanity, nervous conditions,fear of chocolate... wait this warning label should've been on the top, never mind.


	10. Births: Round Two

DISCLAIMER: DON'T OWN

Chapter Ten  
**Births: Round Two**  
~o~O~o~  
_Olivier Etienne Lebeau_

Rogue was in the shower when the first contraction hit her. She made her way to their room, and shook Remy awake. At first he mumbled that the alarm hadn't yet gone off, but her statement " The baby's coming" had him up in a flash. He gathered his wife and started to run out of the room, but she reminded him that had forgotten their daughter...and his pants.

He briefly sets her down while he dresses and takes Kaitie to Wanda. Sounding the alarm on his way back, he picks up his wife and rushes her to the med lab. Hank arrives a moment later, and Remy demands to know what kept him. It was at this point, Rogue asks if Hank can give Remy a sedative. Hank shakes his head while Remy protests.

Logan orders the children back to their beds, as they still have another two hours before they should be up and goes down to check on Rogue, Storm trailing behind him. John and Wanda hold Kaitie and William in the corner, Jean and Nathan are sitting nearby with Emma. Jubilee and Bobby are pacing the floor, Jubilee slightly freaking out over her own impending birth a few weeks from now. Kitty and Emma are far more calm, however, Jubilee blows that off as they still have awhile to go. Amara and Tabitha decide to return to bed, their husbands in tow. Piotr is sitting near Kitty sketching a picture of the babies.

Jubilee will not calm down despite her husband's attempts. So Wanda and Jean take it upon themselves to assure her that, aside from the pain, and the blood, and the healing it wasn't that bad ( yeah they decided to mess with the already freaked out girl). Bobby then glares at the other two, which in turn causes John to yell at him over giving Wanda a dirty look. Piotr sighs and hopes that this doesn't take to long, so that they didn't end up killing each other.

An hour later, Storm came up to announce...that everybody may want to go back to bed. It was going to be awhile yet. Wanda and John took the kids and went back to bed, as did Jean. Kitty and Piotr headed down to check on Rogue. Jubilee continued to freak out, much to Wade's amusement, when he came in a few minutes later. Wade had missed what was going on up until this point, having been 'out' when the alarm sounded. No one wanted to ask where he had been. Logan had said months before not to ask.

Kitty and Piotr arrived downstairs as Rogue finally talked Hank into giving her husband a sedative. Hank was now chasing Remy around the med-lab, while Remy threw various objects at him and jumped over the counters and beds. The whole time screaming " STAY AWAY FROM ME WITH YOUR EVIL NEEDLES!" Piotr blinks at his friend and asks if he should help. Both Hank and Remy tell him to help them. Kitty shakes her head at them and heads over to Rogue to check on her. Piotr stares unsure which man to actually help, while Rogue finally yells " Remy, man up and take the damn shot or I'm kicking you out of here!"

Remy not-pouts as he sits down and holds his arm out to Hank. Hank mutters something about Rogue starting with that so his lab would still be in one piece. Piotr shakes his head at them all and goes back upstairs to check on the students.

Around dinner time, Remy is woken by Hank, it was time for the baby to come. Five minutes later, Remy watches pale faced as his son enters the world. It took everything he had not to pass out. Hank then asked him if he wanted to cut the cord. The next thing Remy knew, Storm was leaning over him, smelling salts in hand while Rogue was asking if he was okay in the background. After Storm helps him to his feet, Remy begs that no one tell that he did that. If word got back to his brother...or John... they'd never let it go.

Hank chuckles at the young man while Storm goes upstairs to announce the birth. She heads to the dining room where everyone had gathered, and stated " Everyone, Olivier Entienne Lebeau is here. Mother ans son are doing well, and you should be able to visit in about an of the girls pouted about having to wait. Over the next three hours, however, the entire staff as well as Tabitha,Ray,Amara, and Sam had gone down to see the new baby.

~o~O~o~  
It didn't take long for everyone to realize that Jubilee was afraid of giving birth. At first it was only the new parents who noticed, as she was constantly grilling Rogue,Wanda, and Jean over the labor process. It didn't help matters that initially Wanda and Jean were unaware of how extremely frightened Jubilee was, and messed with her constantly over the process. Wanda realized a couple days after Oli arrived that Jubilee was actually afraid, and so she and Jean stopped picking on the other girl. She was already terrified though.

The downside of being terrified of anything around Bobby is that he will eventually loose patience with said fear. As he did with Kurt. and he quickly was with his wife. After deciding that it was really fear of labor that was bothering her, Bobby asked Hank if there was any way to skip that part and go straight to delivery. The answer was no, not without a c-section. So then he moved on to trying to reassure her.

Bobby finally became desperate enough to ask the two new fathers in the mansion for help. Unluckily for him, somehow a video of Remy passing out over Oli's cord had somehow made it's way to the internet. John and Henri had both seen it. Remy was one could talk to him right now, except his wife, with out him going off on the unlucky person. Bobby happened to cross his path,more than once, since the video was uploaded. Hopefully he'll get over it soon. John on the other had, was more than happy to assist in learning who had posted a private moment for the world to see. John had ,however, wasted no time messing with Remy over the video, just as Remy predicted would happen. As did Henri, who had emailed Remy over it four times now, including a remix with sound effects. neither other man had any advise for Bobby as their wives were the calm ones as far as baby-jitters went.

Logan was no help on the matter either. He simply told Bobby that any questions involving babies or pregnancy were in the book and to look it up. Bobby had never actually read the Book he relied on Jubilee and the others to tell him what it said. Now in desperation, he finally opened his copy. Three hours later, his wife was a lot calmer, after reading several passages to her, but he was extremely freaked he suddenly realized. The Baby Apocalypse was upon them. They had to do something! Other wise IT would come. Already, he had allowed several incidents of rule breaking go, before realizing how dangerous the situation was. Now he needed to make it right. Before it was too late! He spent the rest of the afternoon corralling students into the danger room, and begging Hank to 'do something about it' Hank just shook his head. How was he supposed to do anything about it?.


	11. Wade's in charge now

DISCLAIMER: I do not own X-men Evolution

Chapter Eleven  
**Wade's in charge now**

Only an Idiot...or Logan would put Wade in charge of anything. The man was crazy. Not Logan-OCD-about-charts crazy, Dangerously-homicidal-clinically-insane crazy. This was why, everyone had stared blankly at Logan when he explained **OPERATION:MANSION ****EXPANSION** to them at the first staff meeting following Oli's birth.

The Plan was simple in concept. All three new families along with the four future families were to head to a theme park in Florida. They were to be gone a month. Logan decided that that would give him a head start on the construction of the extra wing. The question remained (for Logan) who was going to help watch 20 something children? He chose the first one he could think of. The one who never had plans...because even when he did he would reschedule for the Squad.

Logan asked him to take the children on a wilderness retreat while the renovations began. Wade was more than happy to do so. Soon everyone was packed up and ready to go. Some of the kids were hesitant, but most were completely unaware of how crazy this man really was... they'll learn soon enough.

~o~O~o~  
They all arrived at the campsite with just enough daylight left to set up before dinner time. Wade watched them all with interest, wanting to know for sure which ones would give him trouble (there is always some that will). Jamie, he figured was on that boy was eyeing the s'mores ingredients. There was no way the child was getting any. Wade had doubts about letting any of the kids have them..They were wild enough without sugar. Sugar was bad... it should be in the Book. He would talk to Logan about it when they got back.

Soon camp was set up, and he's assigned jobs to various groups. They realized right away that they were going to be segregated by gender just like school. Only a few were stupid enough to complain, and even then they only did so out of earshot. Wade was still aware of the complaints, and felt the need to give a lecture that was a scary version of Logan's lecture on the Baby Apocalypse. By the time he was done, Jamie, and a few others were half convinced to LOOKING at someone of the opposite sex would begin the Apocalypse. ( A feat that would earn him the honor of opening future classes when Logan learns of it).

As they all filed away from the campfire, following Wade's lecture, many were far more afraid than if they had been telling standard 'campfire stories'. In fact, Rahne accidentally bumped into Illyana, who then fell into Jamie. causing both girls and all six versions of Jamie to scream hysterically over the Baby Apocalypse visiting upon them. Wade briefly considered giving them 'the talk' after they calmed down, but decided being afraid was for the best. He pulled out his check list and marked off ' scare them away from sex'. Next on the list was ' Team building'. He was fairly certain that Logan hadn't thought that thru... if they worked as a team, then wouldn't they eventually be able to overthrow the staff? After all there were more of them... Had Logan learned nothing from their own Weapon X uprising? Oh well, he could try this "Team Building" if Logan wanted him too... it was in the book after all.

And what better way to make them work as a team than abject terror?! Perfect plan! All he had to do was traumatize them into working together and then they could move on to step three " preparing for the future"... Clearly Logan hadn't thought that one through either... oh well. The quicker they finished the checklist, the quicker he could teach them his 'survival' techniques was going to be a fun week.

~o~O~o~  
Week in review  
_Day One_  
_abject terror ... I mean team building._

The sun was just beginning to rise, when a loud war cry was heard through out the camp. Several of the students screamed as they were ripped from sleep by the sound. Soon there were children running everywhere, while a manically cackling Wade chased them around welding his swords. Eventually they managed to Come up with a plan to get away from him.  
Twenty minutes later, a half drowned Wade was slowly climbing out of the lake while the group of children cheered from the shore. He pulled out his checklist, and crossed 'team building off.

_Day Two_  
_Survival techniques... Wade style_

The sun was still firmly asleep when the children were woken to the sounds of a wild animal in the camp. Wade had lured a bear,several raccoon, two possums, a beaver, and two wolves into camp... the plan? To have all the supplies pilfered by animals so that they would have to hunt down breakfast. The flaw to this plan quickly became evident when the animals began making themselves at home, instead of moving on as they should have.  
In the end it became 'team building' round two as they chased the animals out of their camp. After they had all calmed down enough to hear him, Wade instructed them on how to find more food. In the end they ate fish and blueberries for a very,very late breakfast.

_Day Three_  
_Preparing for the future_

Wade decided that clearly this new batch of kids needed real training... there was no way things would remain peaceful. So he created an obstacle course... complete with sand traps, snakes,fire rings, and spiked pits. He woke the children before Dawn to begin the course. By breakfast time, they had all managed to finish the course. However there were several minor injuries. Seeing this he assured them that it was fine, they could just retry the course tomorrow.

After that he send the boys hunting for berries in the forest and the girls were grateful that he hadn't mixed the groups... no one wanted to listen to more screams from Jamies and the girls. Plus several others were almost as afraid as they were. Some questioned the reality of Wade's lecture... but then, it was better to be safe.

_Day Four_  
_Clean up_

Wade assigned several groups to various clean up duties around camp. He wanted to head home as quickly as possible. Plus he wanted to test desegregating the groups in a controlled setting. It worked... kind of. They would work together, but they never spoke to each other... at all. The silence was getting to him, so he decided to liven them up.

Twenty minutes later, he was diving to the bottom of the lake, looking for his swords, and wondering why the 'team building' plan existed again. He still thought it was not only a bad idea but that they were setting themselves up for eventual overthrow.

_Day Five_  
_Survival techniques...Wade style_

**Part One**  
**always carry weaponry**  
Wade decided the most import step to follow first was weaponry. The easiest way to get this theory across to them was to scare them into carrying weapons. But how to scare them enough that they actually pick up a weapon?

~O~

They were all eating their breakfast ( fish much to their disgust at this point). Suddenly a masked maniac (yes Deadpool, but in a DIFFERENT mask).Chasing several wild animals (wolves and bears) into camp while screaming and waving about a gun.  
The children collectively jumped to their feet, however then about half ran in terror while the other half picked up weapons, meaning that the plan was a bust.

~O~

**Part Two**  
**always travel lightly**

To prove this point, Wade decided, while chasing the animals through camp, to light the entire thing ablaze ( he may have spent to much time with John... and thinking about Kaitie recently).

Although they were able to put out the fire before it spread, their camp was completely destroyed. No one had anything left except what they were wearing and their weapons ( if they had grabbed one).

**Part Three**  
**always expect the unexpected**

DEADPOOL . WAS. DEAD !...or at least that's what he wanted them to think... to understand step three, expect the unexpected. He was laying in the center of their former camp, seemingly attacked by the animals who had ran through. The children gathered around him, trying to decide what to do. No one really wanted to check to see if he was really dead, however, they HAD to at least find the keys to the bus...which were in his pocket.

They ended up drawing straws for the 'honor' of approaching the man. Jamie won..or lost, depending on who was looking at it. Jamie slowly approached the man. As he began carefully searching for the keys, the others all unconsciously creep closer to watch. When Wade decides they are all close enough he grabs Jamie while sitting up and stating " You need to study under Gambit, you are a terrible pick pocket" Jamie, and every other student scream like Kurt...used to, because he hasn't screamed like that in months now. Oh well, he'll never really live that down, as a whole new group of kids knew about it.

Wade then informed them that they needed to find something to eat for lunch and dinner because they weren't heading home just yet. They all grumble about Wade being worse than Logan. A few hours later, they have reassembled near the fire. Everyone of them had found SOMETHING editable.( and lots of stuff that wasn't)

Wade then honked the horn to the bus. It was time to go home. They all stare blankly at him at this point. They they all ran toward the wanted to be left behind. And Wade would leave them. A few minutes later they were on their way home. Most were extremely relieved...until he announces that they still need work on their methods, and were being assigned additional Danger room sessions, together.


	12. The End is Coming

DISCLAIMER:Don't own, never did,doubt I ever will

A/N: I know this chapter's a little short, sorry about that :)

Chapter Twelve  
**The End is Coming**

Two weeks. Just two weeks following the return of the students from their camping trip, Wade, Logan, Hank, and Ororo returned home, to find the students throwing an impromptu party. This was bad... it really was. The Charts clearly stated on no uncertain terms that the most likely place for an Apocalypse to begin was at a unchaperoned party. Which was now happening in their house. The children were clearly still in denial of the danger they were in. Worse the majority of the staff had not yet returned home.

The Squad was currently operating with just two members. Clearly leaving Xavier in charge for a few hours was to much for the former leader's nerves. Because there was no other reason why a party should be happening right now. Logan's roar ended the party in record time. Wade and Logan, however, were convinced the damage was already done. No amount of assurance from Xavier could convince them other wise. Hank finally did agree to administer pregnancy tests to every female in the mansion. It was the only way to calm the men down.

Hank honestly couldn't figure out why Logan had become so preoccupied with this obsession. After a few days of making his own calculations he finally came to a conclusion... It was the lack of strife. That is what made him crazy. With out some form of external threat, he had invented an internal one. That was when Hank came up with his most brilliant (stupid) idea ever.

Hank hired a villain He paid a villain to attack the town to give Logan something to do. Because Hank couldn't take it anymore. Logan's insanity was driving everyone else insane. perhaps if Logan returned to normal,everyone else would as well. So Hank put an ad in Craigslist and waited. It didn't take long to receive a response. After interviewing several people ( including Lance,Todd, and Fred) He decided that it really would be for the best to hire a team. So the new Brotherhood was born.

They began their attacks right away, before the staff had gotten a chance to return. Logan and Wade were forced to recruit a few of the students to go with them to fight. They defeated the Brotherhood quickly. But it did seem to work for a few days. Hank then paid them again, just as Logan was beginning to refocus on the Squad. So it continued. Hank would pay them, they would attack, Logan would be distracted from the Squad. Hank decided it was perfect. After all no one else was paying attention,right?

Unfortunately for him, Logan's attention snapped right back into place when he overheard (not a hard thing for him) A couple of the girls discussing pregnancy scares. Or more to the point the two girls who had learned it wasn't just a scare. AND HANK KNEW!Logan freaked out. No one was safe. Emma and Jubilee were due to give birth anytime. But with Emma,Jean, and two additional girls in the same boat, it didn't really matter.

Logan and Wade spent hours calculating based on Amara,Tabitha,and Jubilee vs Two girls,Emma, and Jean. They couldn't afford another. Just one more could push them all off the edge,yet there they were, acting like it was no big deal. Wade was livid. How could they so blatantly ignore his well thought out (for him, for anyone else it would appear a whim ) lecture on the Danger they were in.

THEY. WERE. DOOMED!

The other teachers and their children returned home the same day. As soon as they heard the news, Wanda,Remy,John and Rogue joined Logan and Wade to help with the calculations. Jubilee and Kitty found the accused girls to learn if the rumor was true (it was). Bobby,Piotr, Emma, and Jean went to find out what was going on with the new explained what the Brotherhood had been up to while they were gone. He assured them that so far no attacks had been anywhere near the mansion.

The Squad finally came out of their meeting, and the student body was gathered. Logan was halfway through his Lecture,all the charts were out and he was on chart five, when the alarm sounded. At first Logan looked over to Jubilee and Emma, before realizing that the alarm meant intruders. The mothers,mothers-to-be and babies quickly entered the ground floor panic room, while everyone else prepared for battle.

Everyone threw on their uniforms. Logan and Wade barked out last minute instructions,as John and Remy hustled the students into squads. Hank was busy trying to remember if had paid the Brotherhood for another attack. He didn't think they'd arranged an attack on the his head,Hank headed down to his office to call and double check. Xavier was trying to calm everyone, but was completely ignored.

The battle,as it turned out, was short-lived. Pietro was no longer part of the Brotherhood. Logan had not yet updated the face recognition program. Pietro had come to see his sister, and after everything had calmed down she went out to talk to him. He wanted to tell her about his new daughter,Luna. She had just been born. The siblings spent the afternoon talking about their new families before he left. It wasn't until after lights out that anyone remembered that Logan hadn't finished the lecture.


	13. Births Round Three

DISCLAIMER: I do not own X-men Evolution

A/N by request, I am posting the final chapter a day early, enjoy! :)

Chapter Thirteen  
**Births Round Three**

** The Arrival of Carter Ethan Drake**

Jubilee was nearly a week and a half overdue,and completely convinced that the baby was never coming. She was, once again, beginning to panic. What were they going to do?! Clearly he was completely content to stay in there forever. This was all Wade's fault! If he hadn't switched her pills with breath mints,then she wouldn't be in this mess. She also blamed Bobby. This was half his mess! John advised him not to argue with her on this right now. He said she was using anger to calm her fear. It made sense to Bobby, so he just 'yes deared' her.

Finally, Hank agreed to examine her to make sure nothing was wrong. As it turned out, she was already in labor,or at least dilating. He broke her water while Bobby ran to tell the others. By the time he returned,and the others had gathered in the living room, it was nearly time for the baby to come. Ten minutes later she began some other recent fathers*cough Remy cough* Bobby was calm through out the entire delivery. It wasn't until he held his son that he realized... He was a father now! He didn't know what he was doing, he'd failed this class!

Everyone upstairs had just settled down and began to wonder how long this one would take when Ororo came in to announce " Carter Ethan Drake has arrived. Mother and son are both doing well, however she doesn't wish to have visitors right now. She's trying to talk Hank into letting them go back upstairs. Remy laughs as Rogue states she thinks Jubilee may have been spending to much time with him.

Much to Jubilee's dismay,Hank made her stay overnight in the med-lab. Early the next day, Hank released her. She practically ran upstairs,yelling that she'd finally broken loose. Everyone laughed as they came over to meet the new baby.

******The Arrival of **Megan Elizabeth Frost(Summers)

Emma awoke to a sharp pain about two weeks after Carter was born. She immediately realized what was happening, and texted Logan and Jean. They came and took her straight down to the Med-lab. (un)fortunately,thanks to recent developments,they could no longer sound the alarm. So Wade goes for the far more dramatic approach after Logan asks that he spread the word.

Wade loudly walked up and down the halls, twirling his swords while screaming " WAKE UP! WAKE UP! MY GOD EVERYONE WOULD BE DEAD RIGHT NOW IF THE CHECK HAD CLEARED! " (this part caused untold fear to everyone in the house,except Logan, who was 20% sure Wade was kidding)

After they were all assembled in the lecture hall ( they no longer trusted the children enough to send them back to bed), Remy began a long, and boring, lecture on the Baby Apocalypse, quoting both the Book and the Charts repeatedly. Everyone was half asleep, so John took over.  
After everyone calmed down, and the fires were extinguished, John calmly continued the lecture. His own punctuated with photographs created via security feeds of several of the recent births. When he got to the picture of Remy fainting over cutting the cord, Wade took over as Remy chased John out of the room.

Wade proceeded to give his horror story version of the coming Apocalypse, complete with babies raining from the heavens like a swarm of locusts, when Storm entered to announce the arrival of Megan Elizabeth Frost (Summers). The realization that the newest baby was the only female born so far this year, threw Wade over the edge (amazingly to most, as the had thought he'd long fallen off). He began pacing and ranting about the next generation on violators were already beginning, and that they might as well give up now, before pulling one of his many guns, and shooting himself in the head with it.

A shocked silence fell over the crowd before he began twitching, causing a mass scream. He sat up, shook his head, and glared at the gun before stating " Damn, that NEVER works!" Before getting up and returning to his rant. Xavier came in at this point ( having heard the gunshot) and urged everyone to return to bed.

Jean,Rogue,Wanda, and Ororo returned to the med-lab while everyone else sent the students to bed and returned to bed themselves. Emma spent the first few minutes the women were with her, cursing Scott's existence. They of course,agreed with her, and helped plot her revenge. Then she went on to showing off her beautiful daughter.

~  
**The Arrival of Meredith Katya Raspitin**

Three weeks before her due date, Hank discovered that Kitty's baby was huge. Far to big for her to deliver naturally. This was the downside to a midget and a giant breeding. Hank scheduled a c-section, and everyone gathered again in the lecture hall to wait for the birth.

Logan and Wade tried to talk Kitty into allowing a live feed for the lecture,but she stubbornly refused. She still denied the reality of the danger they were in. Wade was giving the lecture again, Recruiting John's slides for his own. Eventually,Remy took over. The students were beginning to reach a level a fear that was no longer functioning.

He continued the lecture until Storm came up to inform them all that Meredith Katya Raspitin had arrived. The other mothers headed down,again, to see the new baby and mother. Wade again bemoaned the fate of the next generation. This time while packing his bags,and informing Logan that his nerves can't take it. As Wade walks out the front door, Remy asks Logan " How long do you think he'll stay away?" Logan snorts and replies " Twenty says he's back by the end of the day" Remy nods and then wanders around,gathering the bets from the rest of the staff.

* * *

A/N: This story was far more bizarre than the previous five, for that I apologize. I still have further ideas for this universe, however I'm taking a short break to finish another story Featuring Wade,Wanda,John,Remy, and Rogue :) However I will be posting a one shot (pre-book one) of the Halloween Incident mentioned in Chapter 9 in a day or two


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